What is homesickness, you ask? Well, before I tell you what I know about homesickness, I will tell you about home.
Some well-known adages about home are:
* Home is where the heart is.
* There’s no place like home.
* Home Sweet Home.
* Home is where your rump rests. (gotta love Pumba)
(You can find some other insightful quotes on home here.)
But isn’t home a little more than that?
It’s true when they say, ‘You don’t know what you have until you lose it.’ While I haven’t completely lost my home, I have had a taste, these past few days, of what it feels like to have to give yours up at short notice and keep going as best you can.
As I sit here and try to use words to convey the feelings I have about my home, I find myself at a loss. And for those of you that know me, that’s saying something! I love my home, mess and all! It’s where I have strategically placed things that are important to me and my family – visual reminders of our identity, achievements, entertainment, and all sorts of whatever it is that makes us who we are. It’s where I know where everything is (relatively). It’s where I can’t wait to let all my cares fade away as I indulge in a little R&R. It’s where my little ones feel… well… at home. Duh.
When we left, we were told to bring essentials for a few days. What does that mean?! Are any two days the same? I mean, even if you have a routine down pat, life keeps happening and you have to adapt on a daily basis. Or is it just me?
But, I digress, home is the hub from which we launch our assault on life everyday.
I miss my hub, my babies miss our hub. We are staying with some loving and generous friends, and while the novelty of a new environ is all good, we are all pining for our own home. I think we have a severe case of Homesickness.
So what is homesickness, again, you ask?
This is what Wikipedia has to say on the matter:
“Homesickness is the distress or impairment caused by an actual or anticipated separation from the specific home environment or attachment objects.”
This morning, on the drive to school, I asked my kids, ‘If you could go anywhere on the Wishing Chair where would you go? Miss 7 promptly answered to some island, Mister 4 answered to some Superhero place and Miss 14 quietly said, ‘I would just wish to go home.’ Can you imagine how that would have torn my heart to shreds?
I mean, from the very first moment that I became a mother, the first instinct that overtook me was a fierce protectiveness. Sadly, over the course of the last few days, I have had to learn the hard way that sometimes, you have to surrender one kind of protection to uphold a more pressing kind of protection. While I can’t protect my bubbas from the pain of homesickness right now, I hope, that what we are sacrificing for right now – a broader physical and emotional protection – comes to fruition and that this will all have been worth it.
What does homesick mean to me today?
It means a loss of the feeling of absolute power over protecting my children.
And that’s all I have to say about that.